For five years after the death of my sister Christine, I had many interactions with my youngest sister Jill. Jill passed from this life on March 25, 2019 on the feast of the Annunciation. Those years were difficult for both my sister Jill and myself. The posts on this page chronicle the declining health of my sister and the changes in my attitudes toward her.

From Jill’s birth to her early death at the age of 62, Jill had many health problems. Unknown to even the doctors, Jill was born with four kidneys. In her infancy contracting a cold caused a high fever and convulsions which led to Jill being hospitalized. Eventually the fever subsided and Jill was released from the hospital after having lain in ice water for several days to bring down the fever. The illness and high fever damaged Jill’s teeth and may have caused some injury to her brain. Jill did not begin to speak until about the age of four. This issue caused her to be behind in school and followed her throughout her life.

As a teenager Jill not only started smoking but developed diabetes which plagued her the rest of her life. Jill passed away after spending several years on dialysis, a treatment that kept her alive after her kidneys failed. For those who are unaware dialysis is a life saver but it also steals away a life. The patient’s life depends upon a machine to clean the blood, causing mental and physical problems. Jill’s cause of death was kidney failure.

As someone who is not diabetic, who has struggled to keep my weight at a normal level, has never smoked and is physically active, it was difficult for me to accept that Jill was not responsible for what happened to her. No matter how hard Jill tried, she could never quit smoking although she had decreased the number of cigarettes smoked per day. Diabetes makes it almost impossible to lose weight which Jill desperately needed to do.

Over the course of 5 years I came to recognize the strength of character and the courage of my youngest sister. We all have blind spots. We all are failures with some part of our lives. No one is perfect. Spending time with Jill taught me to be kinder and more accepting of the struggles which we all face. I miss my youngest sister, her wit, her crazy attitudes and just her presence.