I had another strange and beautiful experience at Mass on Saturday. Fr. Brian was the celebrant.
There is a time after Communion is over that the priest or a Eucharistic Minister returns the unused Consecrated Hosts to the Tabernacle. This time Fr. Brian carried them to the Tabernacle and put them away for later use. I have been trying to pay more attention at Mass and this particular time I saw on Fr. Brian’s face a look of pure contentment as he carried the Consecrated Hosts. I have pondered all evening and this morning what I saw. I liken what I observed to that of a mother carrying a beloved child. There is a sense of mystery, joy, contentment in the look.
This is not the first time I have observed Fr. Brian during Mass. One day – perhaps I wrote of it earlier – it was as time stood still and he reached for the chalice of wine. I don’t know if it was before or after the Consecration, although I believe it would have been after the wine became the Blood of Christ. Fr. Brian’s actions seemed to be so practiced, so ordinary – if I can use that word – so natural to him that I thought at the time that he was truly called to the priesthood at birth.
Fr. Brian suggested to us, after he had returned to his seat, that we take a few moments to just sit and contemplate as we held within us Christ Himself, and listen for God to speak with us. I wonder now if he saw people leaving and wanted to stop them. But no matter. I did what he suggested. There was the tiniest whisper in my ear – I love you. And I knew that God was speaking to me. And instead of my usual “I don’t deserve Your Love”, I just accepted the words and took them to heart. The Great God of the Universe loves me.