At the campfire with Jesus

Sacred Heart of JesusWe see in the Gospels how Jesus takes Peter, John and James with Him at the Transfiguration and at other times. But what about the other Apostles? How is it that they knew they were loved by the Lord, that they willingly gave their life for Him? In my mind’s eye, I see a group of men sleeping around a campfire, each man’s head resting on his arm or a wrapped up cloak or maybe even a convenient rock. All are asleep except Jesus. He sits quietly by Himself. Then one of the Apostles opens his eyes, maybe it is Phillip or Andrew or one of the others. They look and see that Jesus is still awake. Jesus turns to this Apostle, recognizing that He is being watched. Perhaps there is a smile of recognition, a slight movement of our Lord’s head and the Apostle knows he can go to Jesus. So the Apostle rises and sits next to the Master, warming his hands near the fire, maybe throwing another small branch on it. They sit together quietly for a time enjoying the sounds and smells of the season, and then the Apostle speaks. “Master, what did you mean when You said “thus and so” today, or why did You heal the blind man or why did you call me – me”? Jesus looks at him with eyes that could see his soul and smiles. Maybe there is an audible answer, maybe the answer is heard interiorly. Then Jesus and the Apostle go back to staring at the fire, each one nodding off for moments or for hours. Only one man, perhaps, never goes to Jesus in the quiet of the night, one man who believes he understands everything, knows all the answers. In the end that man who never felt that special pull of the Lord, who never knew how important and how loved he truly was, will betray his Master. While the others run away at that time of betrayal, each one goes to his death eventually with the love of their Lord leading them to Paradise.

I think sometimes that is what the hour of Adoration is – my sitting around the campfire with the Lord, having His full attention, enjoying the night, the fire, the companionship, asking my small questions, listening for an answer.